"I've just stopped helping friends altogether because it feels like having the..."

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I've just stopped helping friends altogether because it feels like having the nebulous qualifier 'good at computers' entitles any and all acquaintances to treat you like slave-labor tech support.

And that's bullshit, because you can't do that will any other skillset; if you've got a friend who's got some culinary talent, you never hear someone say something to them like:

"Hey, dude. I'm really craving a South Western omelet with a spicy honey glaze, and I was kinda hoping you could help me out.

Huh? Google it? Google what? Oh, Google the recipe -- why would... why would I seek out step-by-step instructions and try to solve my own problems? Sounds like it involves work. And reading.

Why not, dude? You're so good at cooking!

I mean, I'm not gonna compensate you in any way, but you're so good at cooking. It'll be fun!

Granted, I'm gonna eat the entire fuckin' omlette, so there'll be no tangible benefit for you, but it'll still be fun.

Well, no, of course it doesn't sound like fun to me... I'm not a fuckin' idiot... But I bet it'd be fun for you!

Oh, also... Couple things. I'm gonna hover over your shoulder the entire time and complain about how long it's taking every five minutes or so.

On top of that, you'll probably get a call two weeks later, like 'Hey, man... What's up? Oh, I'm fine. Just got done eating a deep fat fried pepper stuffed with bacon and sauteed in Tabasco.

Anyway, for whatever reason, I feel like I'm gonna shit my pants any second, and I'm pretty sure it's cause that omelet you made me two weeks ago gave me indigestion...

You wanna come over and grill me a steak to make it up to me?'"
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